Building a Gratitude Practice During Perimenopause
A gratitude practice can improve mood, sleep, and resilience during perimenopause. This guide explains the science, different approaches, and how to make it stick.
What a Gratitude Practice Actually Is
A gratitude practice is the habit of deliberately noticing and recording things you appreciate, ranging from small moments of pleasure to larger sources of meaning and connection. It is distinct from simply feeling grateful when things go well. The practice involves training attention toward positive experiences even when life feels difficult, which is particularly relevant during perimenopause when hormonal changes can bias perception toward negative or threatening information. Gratitude practices are used widely in positive psychology, cognitive therapy, and mindfulness traditions.
Why Gratitude Can Help During Perimenopause
Fluctuating oestrogen affects the brain's limbic system, which regulates emotion, memory, and threat detection. This can make negative thoughts feel more intrusive, anxiety more persistent, and mood harder to stabilise. A consistent gratitude practice works against this by deliberately activating the brain's reward circuits and reducing activity in the default mode network, the area associated with rumination and self-criticism. Over time, the practice reshapes habitual patterns of attention, making it easier to notice positive experiences without dismissing them.
What the Research Shows
Research on gratitude interventions is substantial and growing. A 2003 study by Emmons and McCullough published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that weekly gratitude journaling produced better sleep, more optimism, and fewer physical complaints compared to neutral journaling. A 2011 study in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being found that writing three grateful thoughts before bed improved sleep quality and duration, which is directly relevant for the insomnia many women experience in perimenopause. Studies also link gratitude practice to reduced depression, lower cortisol, and stronger social connections.
Different Ways to Practice Gratitude
The classic approach is a nightly three-item gratitude journal. Write three specific things you appreciated during the day and why they mattered. Specificity is more effective than generality, so 'my friend called to check in on me' is more potent than 'my relationships'. Other formats include gratitude letters written to people who have positively affected your life, morning appreciation pauses where you spend one or two minutes mentally noting what you value about your life, and verbal sharing of a daily appreciation with a partner, friend, or family member.
Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them
The most common pitfall is going through the motions without genuine reflection. Writing the same three things every day in a perfunctory way reduces the benefit. Challenge yourself to find something new or specific each day. Another pitfall is toxic positivity, using gratitude to suppress or deny difficult feelings. A gratitude practice should sit alongside, not replace, honest acknowledgment of what is hard. Perimenopause is genuinely challenging, and gratitude works best when it creates balance rather than denial.
Making the Practice Stick
Attach your gratitude practice to an existing habit, such as making morning tea or brushing your teeth at night. Keep a small notebook by your bed or use a notes app if you prefer. The habit becomes automatic within four to eight weeks for most people. If you miss days, restart without self-criticism. Even two or three sessions per week produces measurable benefits over time. Pairing gratitude practice with symptom tracking gives you a dual record of both what is difficult and what is sustaining you through the perimenopause transition.
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